TAYLOR:	This is the second time you’ve come to my gate and threatened my colony. There won’t be a third. Next time I’m going to war.
	-- Taylor to Mira (Note: Only the second time?)

“I want to see the dinosaurs.”

-- Julia, age 9, reacts to the first three-quarters of this frustrating and largely boring episode.

I missed the first few minutes of this episode and tuned in just in time to see my idol Wash shoot a Sixer in the nuts. “Awesome! This episode is going to be EPIC!” I exclaimed, rubbing my hands together in glee as Wash efficiently took out two more Sixers and was only stopped by a particularly badass Mira. “That’s what she said… EPIC!”

…Not so much. There were some interesting hints thrown around, and one or two things I liked, but “The Runaway” suffered from a severe case of Lost-it is (and not in a good way), and it was not, I’m sorry to say, interesting or intriguing enough to make me forget about its problems.

What I missed at the beginning, evidently, was the emergence of a wild-haired feral-looking Sixer child named Leah outside Terra Nova’s gates. Apparently, although they have high-tech weapons and vehicles, the Sixers don’t have combs. They do, however, have toothbrushes, as evidenced by Mira’s gleaming, perfectly straight, blindingly white teeth. It’s so comforting to know that even in this world of privation and want, the art and science of cosmetic dentistry can survive. But I digress.

Anyway, Leah says she’s not going back, no never, and moves in with the Shannons, who befriend her, as the Shannons are wont to do. But! It turns out that Leah is a Sixer plant who was sent to infiltrate the colony and retrieve a mysterious box from Mira’s old house. But! She was only doing it to protect her sweet and innocent little brother, whom Mira had threatened to hurt if Leah didn’t produce the box. But! Taylor’s heard enough and doesn’t believe her. But! Jim does, and he charges headlong into the forest to get ANSWERS.

Meanwhile, Private Bland, citing Taylor’s instructions, requests permission from Maddy to “court” her. First of all, “court?” Srsly? Second of all, ew. Third of all, I hope and pray that Taylor was just messing with callow young Bland^♦  (who may be bland but he’s way hotter than Josh, and it strains credibility that he’s neither sought nor received female attention up to this point, but whatever), as Jim clearly was when Bland approached him. On the other hand, you know what would be interesting? If Bland really and truly is wife-shopping, and the young ladies of Terra Nova are expected to start popping out babies at 15 or 16 or so (for the survival of the colony and all that), and this somehow wasn’t covered in orientation. And then Jim finds out and goes ballistic, and there are lots of big fights about Maddy’s right to self-determination vs. the needs of the colony for new blood. A show about reproductive freedom on Fox would be… unexpected, and potentially very interesting. What if Jim (or Elisabeth) is all “Babies YAY” and conversely Elisabeth (or Jim) responds “Our daughters are not BROODSTOCK” and the two of them actually experience some actual conflict? What if Skye arranges for Josh’s ex Kara to come to Terra Nova, abetted by Josh -- who doesn’t realize that he’s expected to form a pair-bond become a baby daddy without further discussion or ado, and furthermore he’s just bought his beloved girlfriend a life of reproductive slavery? This could be good… although something tells me that we’re not going to go down this road.

Then the part of the show that really pissed me off: Jim gets himself abducted by the Sixers, as was his plan all along, and faces down Mira and her beautiful teeth. “Some serious shit is about to go down, and you want to be on the right side,” she (basically) tells him threateningly. “Huh wha?” Jim (basically) responds. “You’ll see,” she sneers.

“You’ll see?” Oh, for crying out loud. They used to pull this sort of thing on Lost all the time -- a character would ask a question (or fail to ask the blindingly obvious question), another character would give a cryptic answer, and instead of saying “Would you mind explaining what the HELL you mean by that” Character 1 would more or less shrug and respond “Okay, cool.” That used to drive me nuts. If Mira is trying to get Jim on her side, and he asks why he should trust her, it’s really dumb of her to respond “Uh… reasons.” And it’s really dumb of him not to reply “What the what now, Mira?”

But he doesn’t, and what’s more he doesn’t report the guts of the conversation to Taylor (who, to be fair, does a crap job debriefing him). That sort of suggests that he has a Hunch about things. And this being Jim, his Hunch is undoubtedly correct.

Side notes: I liked the Sixers’ treetop homes, but what’s with the face paint and the feathers? (Also, does it seem odd to anyone else that the Sixers are all people of color?) And on a completely unrelated note, I don’t understand the technology they have available at this place. They have electricity, computers, vehicles, the ability to conduct genetic engineering experiments even at their remote outposts, and some fairly sophisticated weaponry, but when a Sixer vehicle appears within range, they’re reduced to shouting through cupped hands, without any sort of intercom or formal alarm system. Like I said, I don’t understand.

As you may have read elsewhere, Geek Speak is about to go on the dreaded hiatus, but we couldn’t possibly keep you hanging with news from the frontlines of Terra Nova! Reviews will continue throughout the break, so stay tuned!

^♦I can’t remember the guy’s real name to save my life, and I’m far too lazy to look him up, so Bland he shall be. You know who I’m talking about, anyway.

The Checklist

Private Bland gets his ass kicked:	I’m still hoping Taylor set him up to look stupid in front of Maddy, but his corporeal form remained intact this week (although Jim did threaten him, but I think Jim was kidding. I think.) And speaking of corporeal forms…
Someone gets eaten by a dinosaur:	No.
Shirtless!O’Mara:	No! Yet another thing wrong with this episode.
Taylor does something simultaneously badass and stupid:	Maybe indirectly. That awesome giant dinosaur-skull desk had to come from somewhere.

 
   -- Kate Nagy