HOWARD:	Do you like science-fiction?
BERNADETTE:	No.
HOWARD:	Role-playing games?
BERNADETTE:	Like in the bedroom or like Dungeons and Dragons?
HOWARD:	Either.
BERNADETTE:	No.
	-- The Big Bang Theory, “The Creepy Candy Coating Corollory” (03.05)

TROY:	This is why I wanted to play Chutes and Ladders.
	-- Community, “Advanced Dungeons and Dragons” (02.14)

A gamer never forgets her first set of polyhedrals, and I’m certainly no exception. From the first time I watched that shiny d20 bounce across the dining room table, I forgot a lot of things. I forgot that Jack Chick said I’d go to hell, that moms across the continent said I’d go mad, that my peers said I would devolve into a social pariah. What I discovered was a world where logic triumphs and persistence is rewarded, where good wins against evil and where I get to wield one heck of a sword. I found a world of fantastic monsters, fascinating people and challenging quests.

Oh, and did I mention a sword?

So I would like to thank my husband for introducing me to tabletop role playing. Yeah, that’s right, I play Dungeons and Dragons. Almost every Friday, in fact. And no, I’m not ashamed of it. I’ll admit that, when I began, I thought I would be ashamed. I figured I’d keep my dice hidden and my rule books tucked under my bed and my notes stuffed in a backpack. That was until I participated in my first gaming session: the fire of role playing took hold of my blood and there was no quenching it. It occurred to me that I would not be ashamed to say I had sat passively through a movie or a television show. I would not be ashamed to say I had read a book. I would not be ashamed to say I played a video game. Why should I be ashamed to admit that I had helped to tell a story? Nobody at that table thought the events unfolding were interchangeable with reality, nobody pillaged innocent villagers, stabbed puppies or ate babies. At the end of the game, I was left wondering what, exactly, I was supposed to be ashamed about.

Six years and innumerable games later, I still don’t understand why I should be ashamed. Every week I hang out with friends and we laugh and joke and have a good time. It’s hardly a basement-dwelling, shut-in activity we have going on (which is just as well, since my mom refuses to come over and fix us all dinner). Sure, for a couple of hours we’re knights and paladins, rangers and rogues. But we’re communicating, thinking, debating. We are a team with a mission to accomplish and we need to use a fair amount of problem-solving skills to get that job done.

Seriously?

And the next day I go out into the world knowing that I have it in me to solve whatever I need to get done there, too.

So -- you ask -- what exactly is tabletop role playing? I mean, I see all those books and the dice. Egads, the dice! Do you really need six dozen dice?

I’ll be honest that I was plenty confused when I first began. My then-fiancé set a bulging bag in front of me and I sifted through dice with more sides than I thought physically possible. I mean, a die with 100 sides? This was starting to defy logic. But my fiancé broke it down for me quite simply. Only eight dice are needed to play. Each die has a particular role in the game and some will be used more than others. Essentially, the dice decide the events that cannot be role played. For instance: whether a sword strike hits the target, whether my knight falls off of a bucking horse, whether the rogue opens the lock. Oh, and that 100-sided die? Turns out it’s really more a novelty.

What the dice don’t control is where the role playing -- and the real fun -- begins. How do we handle the troll warlord? What will we say to the Duke to convince him he has a spy in his court? What do you do when the paladin absently refers to his deity as a douchebag while in his god’s presence? The dice handle the details; we players handle the story. In essence, role playing is like being a character in a novel. One person, the Dungeon Master or Game Master, sets the world and the story in motion -- like the author -- and the rest of the group interact with the people and creatures of that world.

And reading the rule books is important, too. The rules are your road map as you travel about the world – they let you know how the system works and how different scenarios are handled. The books help to sort through any confusion and give guidelines on how a world can operate. I say “can”, because different Dungeon Masters structure games differently. Some are sticklers for the rules and some use them as suggestions in formatting a world. It sounds confusing, but once you get involved, everything flows easily and makes sense. Okay, I admit that even I was daunted at first, but once I read the Player’s Handbook, things began to come together. Then, once I took dice in hand and began playing, I caught on quickly. A good rule of thumb is to read the rule books, but don’t feel as though you must memorize them -- they’ll be there for you and your group to reference as questions arise.

Dice being disciplined.

So I am not ashamed to be a gamer. I am not ashamed to say that every Friday evening I am a knight of St. Cuthbert -- I kill dragons, fight orcs, traverse universes and save kingdoms. I am not ashamed of this because, come Saturday morning, I am still me. But I am a me who had a good time with my friends, who has stories to laugh about and common ground on which to meet. I know why there are twenty-sided dice in our freezer (hey, they have to be punished for misbehaving and constantly rolling 1’s), and how many energy drinks I must consume before I realize that I really can speak Latin.

And the lessons from gaming still linger deliciously in my mind come Saturday morning. Most importantly, remembering that if my character can be bold when needed, so too can I. No, I am not my character, but she is a part of me. She is that part that I dig down to find when I need to stand my ground, to speak the truth. She is the part of me that demands to be taken seriously, even if it means I have to work harder.

Anyone remember the Dungeons and Dragons cartoon from the 80's? Good times.

Yeah. I game. And I wish I could invite those of you who are unsure about gaming to come and game with me. I wish I could bring you into this world I have found, show you the reality beyond the stereotypes. I wish we could paint some miniatures together or pick out a set of dice. I wish I could help you create a character and discover that role playing is not about hiding within a fantasy world, but about finding out who you are and then challenging yourself. I wish I hadn’t just written a paragraph that sounded like we should all hold hands and sing “Kumbaya”.

So, here’s to everybody who one day of the week is a paladin, ranger, barbarian, druid, fighter, wizard, sorcerer, rogue, knight, bard or any myriad class of characters. Here’s to everybody who runs a game and challenges us in worlds beyond our imagining. And to all those on the outside tentatively looking in: come on and join us, you might just find yourself having a good time with some brand new friends.

And to my first set of dice: thanks for all the twenties, and may you never see the inside of the freezer.

-- Katie Hager

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