While they annoy some people, I find trailers to always be a highlight of the theatre experience. I usually see most of them online, but getting to see them theatrically always proves to be infinitely better. But that delight can go sour when you see the same trailer over and over again, almost to the point of it feeling like it is on loop. The first trailer for The Green Hornet was that kind of beast, burning its images of camp and stupidity into my retinas. I reserved a special kind of hate for it, despite the film still being months away from release. But with Michel Gondry behind the wheel, and Seth Rogen in the lead, there was no way it could possibly be as awful and annoying as that trailer was, right?

Partygoer and bachelor Britt Reid (Rogen) has just inherited his father James (Tom Wilkinson)’s newspaper empire. Stunned by the death, Britt is paralyzed with thoughts of what he could possibly do next to fill the shoes James left behind. By chance, he meets Kato (Jay Chou), his father’s mechanic. The two develop a bond, and while out vandalizing property, end up saving a couple from harm by a gang. Britt decides they should fight crime, and eventually dons the guise of The Green Hornet. But as the pair moves closer to eradicating crime, the self-proclaimed crime lord Chudnofsky (Christoph Waltz) will stop at nothing to make sure they do not succeed.

It may be unfair to say it, based on the film’s long and sordid history coming to the big screen, but The Green Hornet can only be described as messy. It is not a complete disaster like some critics and writers have said, but it is far from being a masterpiece either. Every element just seems to be out of whack, and even with its heart in the right place, nothing seems to work for more than a few minutes at a time.

The storyline and writing seem to be the main problem. From the very beginning, the film has no idea what it wants to be. It alternates at varying lengths as a buddy comedy, as an action film, as a campy and satirical throwback, and as a film that just wants you to take it seriously. Never once do any of these ideas come together, they seem content to just work independently from each other. The entire tonal structure of the film suffers as a result, leaving a lot of the dialogue stunted and either not funny or totally inappropriate (although a handful of one-liners hit exactly the way they should). I do not want to lay blame with Rogen and his screenwriting partner Evan Goldberg, but the conflicting ideologies scream that they had next to no idea what kind of film they wanted to create. It felt like they just took the characters and their basic origins, and then took what worked in Superbad and Pineapple Express, and just combined it. Unfortunately, it ended up feeling a bit too close to Superbad and the kind of movie they would have written as teenagers, than the kind of movie they should be writing as adults.

And because of these writing problems, it seems to have held back the majority of creativity Gondry had the potential to unleash. There are some very stylish shots sprinkled throughout the film, specifically the rather intriguing fight style and vision employed by Kato, but the film does not feel like a Gondry picture at all. This is very clearly foreign territory for Gondry, and it looks like he is struggling throughout to make the studio film he was commissioned to make as opposed to his own artistic vision. This is a studio-driven, heavily manufactured film that just happens to have his name on it. Do not go in looking for another picture in the vein of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind: you will not find it.

Even with the bad writing, Rogen still makes the most of things as Britt. He has an unequaled enthusiasm throughout the film, and his is definitely the most gung-ho character. But you can sense how tired he is from holding the entire film on shoulders by himself. He seems to know that it is a mess, and tries to apologize for it whenever he can. But he still is not strong enough an actor for this kind of leading role, and it shows.

As for the supporting actors, I am not sure what can be said. Chou tries his best as Kato, but he plays second fiddle to Rogen the entire time and never gets a chance to shine. Some of his martial arts moves are pretty awesome in their own right, but his dialogue and presence are constantly being undermined by Rogen’s need to be the centre of attention at all times. Waltz hams it up as the villainous Chudnofsky, playing fairly liberally on the satirical and silly elements he is given. He seems to be having fun (although he has an expression of disgust and anger for the entire film), but he never completely gives himself to the character. He merely offers what he can, and then moves on. Cameron Diaz, a love interest and squabbling plot point for Rogen and Chou, just looks uncomfortable in her role. She is not introduced until almost halfway through the film, and never once offers any of the charisma or wit her character seems to suggest. If you thought she was a terrible actress before, this role will not help change your mind.

There were a few enjoyable moments in The Green Hornet (a late nod to the original TV show is particularly noteworthy), but the film is just an all around disappointment. What little spark of greatness it may occasionally offer fades all too quickly.

  -- David Baldwin